


Why I Stay

by Phoenix_Creates



Category: Dream Daddy: A Dad Dating Simulator
Genre: Alcohol, Cheating, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Manipulation, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Eventual Happy Ending, Hiding, Jealousy, Mpreg, Multi, Past Relationship(s), Polyamory, Smoking, lying
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-27
Updated: 2019-07-28
Packaged: 2020-07-23 11:34:35
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,232
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20007634
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Phoenix_Creates/pseuds/Phoenix_Creates
Summary: It felt so natural in the beginning.Being in Joseph's arms just felt right; it was something he wanted to bask in for as long as he could.But now it started to feel wrong. He wanted to be anywhere but with Joseph. He couldn't leave though. Joseph was the only one who cared about him, the only one who loved him. He needed Joseph and Joseph needed him.That's why he stayed.





	Why I Stay

**Author's Note:**

> There are two parts to why I decided to write this story.
> 
> First, for as happy and funny as DDADDS is, I feel like there are a lot of deeper topics in it that we brush over in favor of things like looking at Craig's butt or gushing over Brian's dog. I might be looking too deep into things but I wanted to delve into some of those topics that we don't get to talk about very much.
> 
> And secondly, I wanted to try something new. I've never written anything of this magnitude before but I decided to give it a try. This particular story is going to deal with some heavy topics, so please be wary of what is in here. 
> 
> And fair warning: I am by no means an expert on anything that gets discussed in this story, I've just done my research. If there is anything presented that is inaccurate, I sincerely apologize for it. But if anything you read in here seems to resonate with you or someone you know and you think the relationship is unhealthy, I encourage you to reach out and seek help.

In the beginning, Joseph's arm were the only place Danny wanted to be.

He had never felt so safe before, nor had he ever felt so comfortable. It felt like the right place to be, somewhere he never wanted to leave for a million years. He wanted to stay wrapped in Joseph's arms forever, safe and loved. Joseph was the best thing that ever happened to him and he was so grateful he had a wonderful man in his life to help chase away the loneliness.

But as the months went by, his feelings started to change.

He started to question everything between them.

No longer did his arms feel like home. They didn't feel warm or safe like when they started the relationship. They started to feel like chains, cold and iron, preventing him from escaping. He had someone in his life but it felt lonelier than ever; just when he started to branch out more and make new friends, he wasn't out with them like he wanted to be. Joseph said the other dads were looking for something that Danny wasn't, which was why he had to limit his time with them. But Danny still missed them...

It was all okay though. Joseph only held onto him so tight because he didn't want to lose anyone else. He clung to Danny because he needed someone to help him stay grounded, and Danny allowed it because he also needed someone to help him stay sane; they were helping one another. Joseph had a lot of issues he didn't feel like talking about with anyone but Danny and they were trying to work through them together. And Danny had a few issues of his own that Joseph was there to help with. He was just overthinking things again; Joseph told him he did that too much and needed to stop.

They weren't just helping one another; they needed one another.

So despite the intrusive thoughts, he had to stay.

* * *

"Joseph."

They were tangled in bed together, Joseph draped over him while he laid kisses on his neck. He didn't know how many times they had done it this morning but Danny was tired. His body ached, he had marks all up and down his neck he wouldn't be able to hide, and he was just so tired. He had work in soon and wanted to be ready for it.

"Joseph, you need to stop." He tried to push the other man off of him, but to no avail. Joseph was stronger than him and just wasn't budging. They needed to get up and out of bed; they couldn't just lounge around all day. Danny had to go to work and Joseph had to go home. Neither of them wanted people to ask questions and if they wanted to pretend they weren't anything other than friends, they needed to get the day started. 

Joseph finally pulled away from his neck, only to start kissing under his ear. "I thought you liked being marked up."

 _'I don't.'_ "I do but I still have to go to work. I don't want anyone to see them."

He didn't want anyone asking him about his mystery lover, wanting details about his private life, who was in his bed, things like that. He'd been good about keeping it from people, learning how to apply makeup to hide the darker marks and brushing people off with simple answers about his love life. Joseph said they couldn't go public yet, not with everything going on, so Danny did his best to prevent people from asking.

"You're right." Joseph traced the outline of a newly formed bruise on Danny's neck, almost lovingly running his fingers over it. "I want to have these all to myself."

He said it as if it was something precious, something private and intimate that was supposed to be some kind of sweet thing, but that wasn't what it felt like at all. It was just something else that Danny had to hide, something that he couldn't be proud of or look at and smile because they were only a reminder of what happened behind closed doors, a reminder of something he was forced to keep to himself.

But he had to keep reminding himself that he was doing this for Joseph. Joseph went through enough stress in his life; he didn't need Danny adding anything more to it. It was just easier on both of them if Danny hid the marks and Joseph didn't talk about it. That's what benefitted them both in the long run and prevented the questions. Sure it was a little tough on Danny but he just couldn't abandon Joseph like that.

Danny was finally able to crawl out of bed and get dressed, a look at the clock showing that he had around thirty minutes to get to work. Not too much a stretch but he couldn't do the proper clean-up like he wanted to, nor could he fix his makeup to hide his marks. The collar on his work uniform would hide some of the marks but not all of them; he'd have to find a way to get rid of them, especially the one by his ear. There was no way he could walk out without someone seeing it and no way he was going to walk out with that risk.

He showered quickly and carefully, not wanting to put on his soiled clothes from the previous day but also not having a spare set; Joseph didn't want anyone finding any of Danny's things so Danny had to bring clothes with him every time they spent the night together. Last night had been unexpected so Danny hadn't been prepared for the morning after. Taking the yacht out was always a risky endeavor but it was the only place they had any privacy.

Well, they could always change things around, spend the night at Danny's house instead of them always having to sneak around in the yacht or at Joseph's place but Joseph said it was easier on both of them. But it would've been much easier since Danny lived in the neighborhood and had the house to himself now that Amanda was out at college.

Danny wanted to ask, but he had a bad feeling about what he was about to say. "I get off early today. Maybe...you'd want to come over?"

The feeling got worse when Joseph sighed and shook his head, like he was repeating something to a child he had just said five minutes prior. "Today wouldn't be good. I have some things to set up for a yard sale and a couple of counseling sessions I can't miss either. I told you that already."

He most certainly didn't tell Danny that but maybe Danny just forgot again. Like he usually did. "Oh."

Joseph sat down beside him, pulling Danny's hands into his lap. Danny couldn't bring himself to look at Joseph so he focused on the waves he could see outside instead of the man sitting in front of him. "I know, all of this is frustrating. And I'm so sorry that we're in this situation. But with the way things are, I can't run the risk of anyone finding out about us."

 _'You could just get a divorce,'_ Danny thought to himself but didn't say it out loud. They'd had this argument countless times and it led them nowhere. He asked Joseph again and again why not just separate from Mary if things were so bad at home, but Joseph insisted that it was for his kids. Danny understood that, kind of, but he didn't think kids should be in a household with feuding parents.

But every time Danny brought up that point, Joseph would remind him that because it had only been him and Amanda for so long, he probably didn't know what a feuding household was like.

That comment stung but Danny just let the argument die there. Joseph apologized profusely afterward and said the comment was totally uncalled for and he was tired and lashed out, but a part of Danny felt like Joseph actually meant it. Joseph had been speaking out of turn lately but he blamed the stress he went through when they were away from each other.

It sounded like a flimsy excuse but Danny still accepted it.

He could dwell on that later. He still had to get changed for work and he didn't have the time to start another argument. "I know. I'm sorry."

Danny didn't hear what Joseph said next but he did feel it when Joseph leaned forward and kissed his forehead. "I love you Danny."

He swallowed back the lump in his throat. So many words were coming to mind but he didn't want to say any of them. There was only one thing he could say back. "I love you too."

Those words always burned when he said them.

* * *

Danny's mood significantly improved as soon as he got to work.

He worked at a downtown bakery, a small, homey little place right in the center of town. It was only him, his boss, and his friend Adrien that worked there, but the three of them made a pretty good team. His boss, a kind old woman named Lucille, was one of those people who believed that love and caring were secret ingredients in all her baking, and it showed. Everyone who came in could sit down, eat, and leave feeling like part of a family. And Lucille treated everyone she met like they were dear to her, rather than just strangers or people he worked with.

The place felt like an escape for him. His job was the only place he could be himself, only having to worry about hiding his marks. Joseph hardly checked on him at work because he didn't have a reason to come down here. The only reason Joseph would ever come was if he was giving his kids a treat, but Joseph baked for them at home. 

While he was at work, he didn't have to worry about seeing his lover in any capacity.

The bakery, Plentiful Pastries, felt like a second home to him, a place where he could escape from it all and feel free to be himself. It was a homey place to work, all marble and French windows and colorful flowers that just felt and looked like a home. It was open and warm and combined a lot of different elements together to make one cozy shop.

And when Lucille handed it over to him, Danny would be sure to keep her spirit alive.

Lucille, even though she had good years left in her, felt comfortable finally letting go of her old bakery and passing it onto Danny. Only her granddaughter had an interest in baking but she was too young to inherit such a place. But Lucille had seen something in Danny, something she said made him worth her shop and more. By the time summer came around, the bakery would be his. Danny would've loved to keep Lucille around and would rather she stay, but she felt confident giving it to him and letting him take over. Danny didn't feel like he had earned it, but Lucille had believed in him and encouraged him to take over.

"Good morning Lucille!"

He heard some shuffling around in the back, then Lucille poked her head around the corner, cheek dusted with small bits of flour. "Danny, is that you child? You're early!"

Maybe by a couple minutes but he might've lied to Joseph a little about what time he needed to be at work today. "I figured you might need some help."

"I ain't old yet! I can still handle this place well enough by myself!" 

Danny laughed. Lucille was a lot more active than people her age; she was more active than people Danny's age too. She very well could run the place herself, but with how popular her shop had gotten, she appreciated the help. It was only three of them in their little bakery but they saw more than enough traffic that they were moderately busy during the day. She didn't like succumbing to "old age" as she put it but she couldn't deny that with the increase in customers, Danny and Adrien were appreciated. "I know you can Lucille but it's Friday. We'll be packed today and there's still a few displays that need to be up."

Lucille finally appeared from the back, her arms loaded with cake tins and wrappers. "Well, there are a few cakes I didn't cut up yet..."

"See? I'm glad I did come when I did."

Lucille waved him off with a laugh. "Alright, ya got me. Why don't you get started on those cakes while I finish up here."

"You got it boss."

It felt so natural to be at his job. He never went home stressed, he enjoyed interacting with people of all ages, and he could be himself. He liked being around desserts, liked sculpting with icing, loved the smells...he loved everything about it. Despite what others may think, he felt like he was in his zone, a place where he thrived and excelled.

Best of all, Joseph didn't come to see him very often.

A part of him hurt when he thought about the fact that his lover would never come to see him (he was worried about someone finding a connection between the two) at his job, but a bigger part of him was glad. Joseph didn't know that he worked with Adrien and probably wouldn't like it. It was better that he stayed away.

But now wasn't the time to be thinking of Joseph. He had a job to do.

* * *

The work day passed as all others did, with enough business to keep them all busy. Danny found himself constantly running back and forth from the kitchen to the dining room in order to restock a pastry, decorate something, or clean up. The morning started with the occasional business person coming in for a sweet pick-me-up before work, the afternoon saw nannies and parents coming in with children for after school snacks, and the evening found large families coming in for family desserts. Even though Adrien acted as their server for the dining room, Danny and Lucille still had a lot to handle up at the register and in the back.

Now, as the last few customers wandered out, calling happy "goodnight"s to all of them, the three were finally able to relax.

"My legs are _killing_ me." Adrien loosened the first few buttons on his shirt and sighed, slouching down in a chair. "Was it me or was the dining room busier than normal?"

"No, it was pretty busy. Fridays are bad but today was unheard of." Even Danny couldn't deny that his limbs felt a bit heavy. His fingers ached from all the designs and icing he had to do on cupcakes today. "There must be some sort of holiday this week."

"Ugh, you're right. I can't believe I forgot; it's all my kids talk about." Adrien shook his head. "I'm all out of sorts lately."

"It's alright. I used to forget all the time when Amanda was in school." He used to remember waking up in a panic thinking Amanda was late to school, only to find out that Amanda was sleeping in because she didn't have school. Amanda was _not_ happy with him on those days.

"A holiday for them means more work for us." Lucille set down a tray of tea and two boxes of cookies. "But for now, let's relax before we lock up."

"Yes!" Adrien immediately grabbed for a box and tore it open, nearly spilling them over in his haste to get at his cookies. Danny chuckled, sipping on his tea instead of going for the other box. He would've loved some cookies, but he couldn't have any.

Unfortunately, Lucille picked up on it. "You aren't gonna have any Danny? I made these for both of you."

"Oh-" Danny laughed. "Oh no. I couldn't. I, I'm uh...trying to watch my figure." He'd been trying to lose some weight lately and all the sweets weren't helping. He loved baking and his desserts but Joseph pointed out that lately, a lot of his clothes just weren't fitting him like they used to. As much as he hated it, he started cutting out most of the desserts from his diet, unless they were the gross healthy kind that didn't have any of the good stuff in them. He wanted to get back down to his original weight, back when he was slimmer than he was now.

"A few cookies won't make you gain 200 pounds," Lucille insisted. "Besides, you earned them. Everyone cheats on their diet now and then."

Danny couldn't say yes but he also couldn't say no. Months ago he would've taken them no questions and scarfed them down like Adrien was doing. And Lucille knew that he loved tea and cookies. If he kept saying 'no' she would ask why and the diet excuse wouldn't hold for very long. He _really_ didn't want to lie to Lucille but Joseph had him on a strict diet.

But he wasn't seeing Joseph tonight. And a couple of cookies really wouldn't hurt him. Joseph wouldn't know. "It is my cheat day."

"Child, every day is a cheat day." Lucille pushed the box into his hands. He didn't dare push them back because he did earn them. He worked hard every day and deserved to treat himself. "Go on now. Enjoy them."

What Joseph didn't know wouldn't hurt.

* * *

**_Are you going to be busy this weekend?_ **

Danny blinked a few times to see if he was reading the message right. This weekend? Lucille closed early this weekend but Danny had been planning on cleaning the house and taking his dog to get groomed. He had been neglecting it the past few days because of work and Joseph but he had made plans he wanted to keep.

_I have a few things to do. Why?_

Too late, he realized he should've just pretended to be asleep. Now that he had answered, it was too late to take anything back.

**_Mary's taking the kids to see her mother this weekend. I thought you'd like to come over instead of taking the yacht out. We'll have the whole place to ourselves._ **

Danny stared at the message, unable to comprehend what was being said. He had things to do this weekend; he didn't really want to spend it with Joseph. But, he was also tired of sneaking around every time he saw his "lover". Any other time, he'd jump at the chance but now he wanted to savor his time alone.

_I think you should get a_

He erased that message before he finished. He didn't want to do this again.

_I'd love to but_

No. Joseph had a habit of knowing when he was lying. 

_Or you could spend the weekend with me._

He almost sent the message. _Almost_. But he knew what Joseph was going to say and it would start an argument.

_What time do you want to meet?_

He could always just push his plans back a weekend. Joseph needed him. His plans could wait just a little bit longer.

**Author's Note:**

> I've written an analysis on Joseph on Tumblr where I explained my feelings on him, but let it be known that I do not hate him, nor dislike his character. But some of his motivations and in-game actions call into question everything about him. Maybe one day I'll finish something that's a bit fluffier with him rather than these kinds of angsty stories


End file.
